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Submitted by: Karen Parsons

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Hi Katie, Thank you very much for taking the to read my story. I agree it is nice to know that other parents feel the same way. I encourage any parent who reads this that has a viewpoint to please post it. Each situation and child is unique, so what worked for my child may not work for yours, but here goes. At first we were angry at the situation and the people involved. I try to live my life with tolerance, non-judgment and forgiveness but I have to tell you that it was difficult for me to practice this at the beginning. When it is your child, as I am sure you know, you get very protective. You want their pain to go away and you can get angry with those who you feel are inflicting the pain. There was a lot of talk in the evenings around the dining-room table about it. Talking about it and helping our daughter with her feelings seemed to help. Our daughter is a very kind and caring person; she was constantly trying to understand why some of the children were behaving so unkindly. She tried different tactics, she tried ignoring the behavior, but that didn't work. She tried standing up to the children, but that didn't work. I suggested that she speak with them one on one and get to the bottom of the conflict, but she was not willing to do this. She withdrew herself from this crowd and began to hang out with some other girls who had also experienced similar problems. This helped alot. If she found herself in a situation that didn't feel good, she would leave and go read a book, if possible. She went to the Principal and told him about the situation. He brought the student into his office and had a discussion with her. Unfortunately, her behavior didn't improve, it just became covert instead of overt. In summary, we supported her at home; we talked through her feelings. We taught her about non-judgment and forgiveness. We explained that the issue wasn't with her the issue was the other person's insecurities. It would have been nice if the school had a better policy in place, or any policy in place for that matter, about "emotional bullying", but they don't. Things are much better this year. Due to a nice long summer break, a larger class size, the children maturing and our daughter's increased self-confidence. Although it was a difficult time, I wouldn't change it. We have grown so much and the lessons learned are invaluable for our daughter as her self-image and confidence become increasingly important for the ongoing teenage decisions that she will have to make. Thank you!

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